


teen idle;

by MistyMoon



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Mentioned Major Character Death, forgot to post this - its from last month, gansey is mentioned, thats the character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 13:35:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5787166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyMoon/pseuds/MistyMoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's all bullshit.<br/>How, after all you've been through, the universe thinks you deserve this.<br/>How you can keep calling and calling, but you know he won't ever answer.<br/>How this could've all been avoided, if only you listened to yourself.<br/>All of it. Bullshit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	teen idle;

**Author's Note:**

> originally written for the prompt "teen idle - marina and the diamonds + blue sargent"  
> i apologize. not really.  
> extremely mini fic, sorry

Your phone rings and rings and rings but he doesn’t answer.  
It’s been minutes and all you need is his voice on the other end of the call (please pick up please pick up please pick up).  
All you need is for him to talk about his stupid discoveries and his stupid love for welsh kings and his stupid fucking mint plant.  
You keep wishing, but you know what’s going to happen.  
He doesn’t pick up.  
He doesn’t pick up the morning after, either. Or the week after.  
You know he’s not gonna pick up. Not now, not ever.  
-  
It’s bullshit, really.  
It feels like you’ve wasted your life, somehow.  
After all those trips to random places, to Cabeswater, to a lake in the middle of nowhere, after all this time you spent looking for Glendower, it feels like all of that was such wasted time.  
All the time you spent running, and searching, and reading, and listening, just because you met these four boys, felt like wasted time.  
It was all wasted time.  
Even when he held your hand and let you rest your head on his shoulder and put on shitty music and drove around with you in his stupid, old car.  
It was going to end sooner or later, and the worst part of it all was that you knew. You knew he was going to leave you. You knew those moments wouldn’t last. You knew he’d be taken away one day.  
But you didn’t know it’d grey out so many good memories you had. You didn’t know it’d grey out your life.  
You wanted your color back.  
-  
It could have all been avoided, really.  
If you had backed away from them (you weren’t supposed to talk to aglionby boys, what about that blue, did you forget, did you forget), you wouldn’t have wasted time with them, you wouldn’t have gotten attached to them.  
You wouldn’t be calling a phone number that doesn’t exist anymore. You wouldn’t be calling a name that’s written on a tombstone. You wouldn’t be tearing yourself apart over the smell of mint.  
You wouldn’t be hurting like this.  
You could be talking to school friends (friends that won’t die after falling in love with you), you could be in love with someone (someone that won’t die after they kiss you), you could be planning for college, you could be hearing about the death of a boy called Richard Campbell Gansey III and you wouldn’t know who he was.  
It’s pointless, but you imagine what would’ve happened if you were like the other people. If you didn’t live in a house of psychics, if you didn’t dress like you did, if you did your hair properly, if you bothered to talk to people in your class.  
You imagine if, maybe, your life could’ve been less tragic.  
If you could’ve been happy.  
-  
It’s been weeks, and you wish you could go back and stop yourself from meeting them.  
It’s been months, and, right now, you wish you could just forget.


End file.
